Okay... let's take a time out for a smile or two.
Here are some quotes from US comedian and talk show host Ellen DeGeneres, as collected by Michael Moncur in his Quotations Page:
"In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better."
"The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens. We can't be the best that creation has to offer. I pray we're not all there is. If so, we're in big trouble."
"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."